More bad "journalism"

Am I even allowed to call it that? You be the judge.

So I edited the stupidest story in the world for Vietnam Golf magazine (if you're thinking, "Vietnam has a golf magazine?", you're not alone).

This is from the article "One Day at Phan Thiet Golf Course," written by a Vietnamese person:

"...as the ninth [hole] is ranked as one of the 500 finest holes in the world. The fairway of the ninth is like the body of an 18-year-old girl that will stir anybody’s heart. The green is so beautiful and challenging, triggering the golfers’ desire to conquer and to hole the ball...the 180-yard ninth is divided by two small hills. The hills, like two full round breasts, are surrounded by pine trees. The only way to reach the green with one stroke is to drive the ball straight through the cleavage."

I took out the reference to the 18-year-old girl and the breasts. I suppose that's infringing on the writer's creativity, but his creativity made me just a little sick.

He also wrote:

"Each play at the Ocean Sand Dunes Golf Club would remind me about the poetic love story and the unfortunate destiny of the owner of the course, [Larry Lee Hillblom.] With the love for golf and for the beauty of Phan Thiet, Hillblom decided to hire Nick Faldo to design the course and invested a huge sum of money in building the property, without paying much attention to profits.

Probably he had foreseen his short life and decided to bequeath one of the world’s golf masterpieces to the next generations, to golfers and to Vietnam. Maybe he had known that a true love with a Vietnamese girl would come from this golf course and his daughter would become a talented golfer. The love for his daughter has been brought into designing the ninth hole of the course, which is a natural, cultural and humanly legacy."

Okay, Hillblom, who made his billions being the "H" of DHL, died in a plane crash at 52. He was well known for his taste in underage Asians, particularly bargirls and virgins. After he died four of his Asian children successfully won a lawsuit for several million. And with the mentioned Vietnamese woman he fathered a son. I cut the story at the line "to golfers and to Vietnam" and sent this letter to my editor:

"Hi Yen, Here's the golf Phan Thiet story. Please look at the bottom carefully. If you REALLY want to add the part about the Vietnamese girlfriend and "daughter" you can, but that information was wrong. For one thing, he had a son, who he never saw in his life. Also, I don't think you can call it a love story with the girl because the well-known story is that he hopped around Southeast Asia sleeping with virgins. Could we end the story where I suggested?"

I also edited an awful column, more fit to run in a junior high rag than any magazine, about whatever happened to playing golf for fun instead of competition? Apparently when one of the columnist's friends plays poorly the columnist will purposely bogey a few holes to let his friend back in the game. He saw this as good sportsmanship, a "how you play the game" type of thing. I see it as being a pussy and maybe you should get some new friends if yours are that whiny.

The worst part was the ending. "One day when my daughter grows older I'll take her out to the course and teach her to play...

For the love of the game."

Uh-oh, you did not go there.