Running away to India for a bit

Yes, running away is probably the accurate term. Things all fell to hell recently, and I thought, I need to go away.

And isn’t India where people go when they run away, when they need to find themselves, Eat, Pray, Love-style? I'm kidding. India’s been in my head for years now, ever since I asked a backpacker on a round-the-world trip, “What’s your favorite place so far?” and he said, “India, by far. It’s amazing.”

That was good enough for me. I don’t even know much about the place, but I know I want to go somewhere vibrant, changing and challenging.

So here’s where things went wrong: I lost my job. I was only there eight months, and I was miserable for six-and-a-half of them. At first I couldn’t be praised enough, but after the honeymoon ended I got on my boss’s bad side, and that was that. Of course I was partly at fault—I made mistakes. But she wouldn't, couldn't forgive, and if you can't start anew, there's no hope for a second chance. The rest of my time at the job was filled with me trying to appease her, her finding fault with everything, and me slowly realizing that I could never please her. It was the most abusive relationship I've ever been in. I’m sad to not be working, but thrilled that I’m no longer constantly stressed, that I don’t re-write emails five times, that I no longer think at least once a day, “Oh God, will I get in trouble for this?” for the most innocuous things.

Instead, I plan for India. This involves a lot more than you’d think. I plan to buy a one-way ticket and don’t know how long I’ll be gone, exactly. At least a month, possibly four, depending on life. In the meantime I’m giving up my LA apartment, a process that involves packing (which itself involves learning how much unnecessary crap I have), and take care of errands like getting typhoid shots, buying a new backpack (it’s been so long since I’ve traveled), using all my Groupons, and looking for places to volunteer. I’ll save learning basic Hindi for the flight.